A Rabid Raccoon Attack (S&D)

by Tate Murray
(Stanford, California )

There were quite a few curious things about the dream I had last night. The first is that I dreamt I was sleeping. I had no idea that was possible until now but nonetheless it was pretty cool. So, I dreamt that I was sleeping and all of the sudden I heard this really weird noise. I jolted awake in my bed (in the dream not in real life) and sat up just in time to see something hairy flying through my window. This creature landed on my floor and proceeded to begin scurrying furiously around my room. At first I thought that it was a squirrel, which didn’t scare me much; plus, I’ve always wanted to pet a squirrel so I was kind of excited at the prospect of having to catch it. Unfortunately for me, I caught site of a gray and black tail and some black little paws and I realized that it was not a squirrel running around on my floor but a raccoon! All of the sudden I was completely overcome with terror. Apparently, in my dream I had a very deep seeded and intense phobia of raccoons. I stood up on my bed and started running in place and jumping around and screaming as the raccoon continued to frantically explore every crevice of my room. I was trapped—If I got off my bed the raccoon would surely bite me, but if I stayed on my bed I feared it would eventually climb right up and bite me anyways. The only solution was to get out of my room…but how? I somehow managed to stretch my body so that my feet were on my bed and my hands were on my door handle. I was almost horizontal but I figured I could swing open the door, swing my legs down into the hallway and then shut the door and trap that dangerous beastly raccoon in my room. I counted down from three and went for it, and at first I thought I executed my plan perfectly. I was standing on my feet, in the hallway and my door was shut. But then I saw it, the raccoon had escaped when I opened the door and even worse, it was foaming at the mouth and so I knew it had rabies. Just as it was jumping up to bite my upper shin, my PHE came out of nowhere with a red plastic animal carrier and caught the raccoon in the carrier in mid air. I was saved. Just as my PHE trotted off into the sunset, actually just down the dorm room hallway, I woke up.

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